THAT WENT WRONG
Friday, Feb 1, 2019
It’s Friday night and Stevie’s been on a quickly approaching deadline and suffering from a debilitating case of writer’s block. Fresh off participating in a process improvement group at work, I am highly motivated to fix all Stevie’s problems.
Because I innately want to fix problems, and this was right up my alley. I run downstairs to grab our girls’ long discarded art board because Stevie and I are about to brainstorm and Gantt chart TF out of her process! In all my excitement and nerding out over the work that’s about to transpire, I apparently shut off my body language perception radar.
Body language radar malfunction aside, I should have known when Stevie took the above picture, something wasn’t right. I’m pretty sure when this was taken I was anticipating all the public accolades I was about to receive for being such an awesome and supportive husband dedicated to helping formalize and standardize his wife’s business process.
And she would have been right to praise my efforts. I was about to change her world.
Little did I know the shit storm I was stirring up when I said, “So, babe. Your business process sucks. . .”
Apparently, when people are stressed out, that’s not an ideal time to start off pitching your intended project with a statement like that. Actually, it’s a terrible way to pitch any idea, and was most likely the genesis of the events that followed.
After a complete meltdown involving many tears, a few choice words, an empty bottle of wine, and a night afraid to sleep in my own bed (have you read her darker books?), I now realize that I was missing one key component of processes improvement initiatives - Buy In. And it is now painfully apparent that what I mistook as buy-in (i.e. above picture) was more of a warning. A warning I should have heeded. It’s said that timing is everything, and apparently, I need improvement in this area.
All is well now. Stevie and I have come to an agreement.
Basically, I’ll agree not to be an insensitive douche—no matter my intentions, and she’ll agree to act sane. It’s a good compromise.
*Realize when your significant other is highly stressed
*Under no circumstances, criticize the above subject
*Under no circumstances, pitch an idea with the phrase: “Your process sucks.”
*Pour above subject a tall glass of wine, and refill as needed.